Ubisoft Store - Free 2 day shipping

Just got Assassin's Creed. Came with an online coupon for free 2 day shipping if you order from the online store. Just go to the Ubisoft Store and enter coupon code: 2DAYFREE at checkout. Coupon is good until 5/31/2008. Enjoy!

Blue Dragon - Marked Down to 32$ at Circuit City

Looks like Circuit City marked Blue Dragon down to 32 dollars for a post-holiday sale. Jack.. I am aiming this post at you, since I know you were looking to buy it.. Now your broke ass can afford it.. With it on sale at this price I may pick it up myself!

Here is a link to the game at Circuit City.

ROCK BAND - REVIEW - PS3 - 9.5/10

A few months ago Chris invited me over to play a little game called Guitar Hero 2, before playing it I didn't really think that it was the kind of game I'd be into - ten minutes later the only thought in my head was to rush out and buy my own copy.But it never happened I kept putting off getting the game because there was this thing called Rock Band coming out in November. The wait was long, life seemed pointless. What the fuck was I supposed to do until this game came out? Since it came out, I haven't once thought about that other game....What the hell was it called again? It's simple, when you are not playing Rock Band, you are thinking about playing it. By the way, Chris, can we please change the name of the site to "Rock Band Over Girls"?

There is so much in the game, that if I were to break it down and give it the proper review that it deserves , it would end up being about six pages long - so let me just touch on the most important aspects.

Drums - The real star of Rock Band is the drum kit it ships with. I am not a drummer, before I played this game, to see me play the drums, let's just say I wouldn't look out of place on the short bus with the rest of the retarded children. Now I feel like the drummer from Def Leopard, I still suck, but people applaud me because I do alright with my handicap and they feel sorry for me. I suppose the only gripe I have, is that the bass pedal sometimes doesn't register when I'm pretty fucking sure that I hit it at the right time.

Guitar - The big argument on the internets, is that the Guitar Hero cheap piece of plastic is way better than the Rock Band cheap piece of plastic. Yes, the strum bar on the RB guitar is shitty, but the fret board is way more comfy. Also, I see many people complaining that RB guitar is too easy compared to GH difficulty - agreed, but I suck anyway, so it's a welcome "problem" for me.

Microphone - It's cool to be just like the assholes you see singing karaoke, but I do wish there was an option to remove the vocals so you can be that asshole. Also, I wish the words scrolling across the screen were a bit bigger.

Bass - Hey, bass player. Look at the bass player. Look at that smile, there's sadness in that smile. Look at that chord structure, there's sadness in that chord structure. Look at him flail like the wailin' wall with nothin' but stubby fingers and a dumb look on his face. He don't know it but he's balding...spiritually. But everybody hates the bass player. No one invites the bass player to the party after the show.

Bruce: Hey, what are you guys doin' after the show? Oh, nothin'? Okay.

Songs - Fan-Fucking-Tastic!!! I'm not going to list them all, but most of them are really good, and the ones that aren't that good are still fun to play. But....there is not enough Box O' Wine in the world to wash away the pain that comes with playing the 45 minute Train Kept A-Rollin'

Multi Vs. Single player - Believe it or not, single player is better because your H-mo friends can't come and take the drums away from you. All joking aside, it should come as no surprise that multiplayer is the better way to go, acting like an asshole with your friends is always more fun than solo-asshole. Don't shit on single player though, it's incredibly satisfying to practice getting better at whatever instrument you fancy.

DOWNLOADS - Harmonix, Keep em coming, I can't be the only jerkoff that will buy every single song that is released. Do me a favor though, there is a world of great songs in the underground music scene that I'm sure would cost next to nothing to secure the rights to.

Songs I would LOVE to see in Rock Band

Alkaline Trio - Private Eye, This Could Be Love, Cringe.

Jimmy Eat World - Pain, Sweetness (demo version please), The Authority Song (also demo version)

Green Day - She, When I Come Around, Holiday.

Descendents - Hope, Cameage, Clean Sheets.

Nofx - Liza and Louise, Punk Rock Elite, Moron Brothers.

Jawbreaker - Accident Prone, I Love You So Much It's Killing Us Both, Boxcar.

J Church - Foreign Films, No Surprise, Open Road.

Yes, I realize that the only songs that have a chance are the Green Day songs, BLOW ME!

PGR3 - REVIEW - Genre: Electronica

Electronica

Genre Rating: 3

Total Tracks in Genre: 12
Length: approx. 58 mins.

The electronica genre is an unusual one. Some of the tracks in this genre, simply don't fit my idea of this genre. It has both excellent tracks, and tracks that are total crap. The consistancy is just not there. Honestly some of the tracks in this genre just ruin the whole thing, which is unfortunate, since this genre also has some of the best tracks in the game.

Guide to rating: 1 = Avoid at all costs / 5 = Can't go wrong with this one.

Track 1
Artist: Alpine Stars
Track: Carbon Kid
Label: Astralwerks/Riverman
Length: 6.25
Rating: 1

This track fits the "Electronica" genre in the loosest sense of the word. More like rock with keyboards.. The track starts off pretty good.. until the vocals come in. The vocals are sooooo annoying its not even funny. The lyrics are ass. They honestly ruin the whole song. I had to listen to this track no less than 5 times, doing this review. I was ready to blow my brains out after the first. No joke. At 6.25, this track is exactly 6 minutes too long. DO NOT listen to this track unless you are compiling a soundtrack for suicide.

Track 2
Artist: Dirty Vegas
Track: A Million Ways
Label: Capitol Records
Length: 5.15
Rating: 2

Another track that I would be hard pressed to classify as "Electronica". This track makes me feel gay listening to it. The vocals are gay.. The music is gay.. But, if you want to spend your race feeling like you are racing to a Beverly Hills public restroom, to meet up with George Michael.. More power to you.

Track 3
Artist: LCD Soundsystem
Track: Tribulations
Label: Capitol Records
Length: 5.16
Rating: 4

FINALLY a half-way decent track in this genre. The music sets the stage well, and the vocals work fine. Best for Tokyo races in my opinion.

Track 4
Artist: Radio 4
Track: Party Crashers
Label: Astralwerks
Length: 5.00
Rating: 3

There is nothing special about this track. The music is ok.. The vocals are ok.. Not a bad track.. But not a great one either. Nothing special here.

Track 5
Artist: Audio Bullys
Track: Real Life
Label: Astralwerks
Length: 3.30
Rating: 3

Music isn't bad, vocals get annoying. It's one salvation is that the track is fairly short. But there are better tracks to listen to.

Track 6
Artist: Phontaine
Track: One More Day
Label: Brighton Sound/Position Music
Length: 2.40
Rating: 5

This track rocks. I like this track so much, I listened to a bunch of other tracks by the same artist on their website. I would buy this. It works really well for any short race, or challenge. At 2.40, you will be wishing this track was longer.

Track 7
Artist: New Order
Track: Krafty
Label: London Records 90 Ltd.
Length: 4.30
Rating: 2

This is a dissapointing one. I love old New Order. ("Blue Monday" is one of the best songs ever) This is not old New Order. This is new New Order. The vocals suck, the music is bland. Avoid.

Track 8
Artist: Crush
Track: Consiousness
Label: Position Music
Length: 3.41
Rating: 4

This song is fast and furious. Perfect for just about any racing situation.

Track 9
Artist: Lunatex
Track: Crawl
Label: Chakrasound
Length: 6.23
Rating: 5

Fits well with most race types, and tracks. Sound is diverse. Can't go wrong with this track.

Track 10
Artist: The Chemical Brothers
Track: The Big Jump
Label: Astralwerks
Length: 4.45
Rating: 4

This track is decent, but not the best track from the Chemical Brothers. I have come to expect more from these guys. The track does work very well though.

Track 11
Artist: The Atlas Plug
Track: The Ace, the Only
Label: Persist Records/Position Music
Length: 4.20
Rating: 4

This track has a pretty heavy sound. Goes on a bit long though, and gets repetitive. Use this one for the shorter races, or challenges.

Track 12
Artist: Robert Miles
Track: Improvisations
Label: S:alt Records Limited
Length: 4.20
Rating: 3

This is a pretty strange song. Lots of bouncing sounds to the right or left. The beat gets lost at times, but somehow it still works. Decent choice for Nurburgring races.

Next Up.. Alternative Rock

<< back to PGR3 Soundtrack Review Index

EA Store - Free Shipping and 20% Off

Got an email from EA today for free standard shipping on any order from the EA Store before 12/27/2007. Also you can get 20% off with the coupon code 08JXN1 up until 12/31/2007. Just type it in during checkout. Pretty sweet deal.

PGR3 - REVIEW - Genre: Dark Electronica

Dark Electronica

Genre Rating: 4

Total Tracks in Genre: 11
Length: approx. 60 mins.

The dark electronica genre is a safe bet for PGR3. In the game, the genre as a whole tends to utilize vocals minimally, and seems to favor instrumentals. Most of the tracks that do utilize vocals in this genre do so effectively. There is good choice in this genre for songs to match a variety of race types. Overall this is one of the better genres you could choose to race to.

Guide to rating: 1 = Avoid at all costs / 5 = Can't go wrong with this one.

Track 1
Artist: Autoaggression
Track: Das Nyquist Theorem
Label: Mindbase/Dependent Records
Length: 5.15
Rating: 2

This track is best for short courses with wide sweeping curves. The beat is steady and simple. I would like to give this track a better rating, but it breaks down at about 3.30 simply into noise. Goes on like that for a good 30 seconds. It actually is quite distracting. Best to use this track on shorter races, where the annoyance factor of the latter part of the track wont come into play.

Track 2
Artist: Aphex Twin
Track: Come to Daddy (Pappy Mix)
Label: Warp Records
Length: 4.15
Rating: 4

The first time I heard this song (or a version thereof) was on the movie "CKY2K". Check out this movie if you have not had a chance, it's hilarious. This song is angry. It will give you road rage. It will have you stuffing your opponents into guardrails, and pushing them out of the way in tight turns. Best for racing against other opponents, unless you are trying to get the "Clean Race" bonus.. Lots of energy makes this track a good choice.

Track 3
Artist: Orbital
Track: Tunnel Vision
Label: ATO Records
Length: 4.25
Rating: 4

This track starts off very slow and mellow and builds up to the end. Simple variation in theme makes it good background music and perfect for long races. This song has Nurburgring written all over it.

Track 4
Artist: Trash Palace
Track: Animal Magic
Label: Discograph
Length: 4.10
Rating: 5

A hard driving compressed bass line, good use of flanging, and excellent variation on theme, make this a perfect track for just about any driving situation. One of the best tracks in the game.

Track 5
Artist: Mindless Faith
Track: Singular
Label: Mindbase/Dependent Records
Length: 6.03
Rating: 3

Starts off slow and brooding. Heavy 4/4 time kick drum comes in quickly. Vocals are present, but mixed low. Lack of variation causes the track to feel stale towards the end. Still a decent choice for longer races.

Track 6
Artist: 30Hz
Track: No Mans Land
Label: Thinking Productions
Length: 7.20
Rating: 5

This track has some sweeps that will test the bass capabilities of your audio hardware. My 400 watt sub, had the neighbors calling about the resulting earthquake, and my wife screaming about the chipped dishes.. Another great choice for just about any driving situation, and at 7.20 the longest track in the genre without ever feeling long.

Track 7
Artist: Micronaut
Track: Perdition
Label: Positron!Records
Length: 3.48
Rating: 4

Overall a solid track. Great for the shorter races. Vocals are barely discernible in the background most of the time.

Track 8
Artist: Stromkern
Track: Stand Up (Extended Mix)
Label: Mindbase/Dependent Records
Length: 5.20
Rating: 5

Prominent catchy rhythmic vocals, make this track a joy to race to. Excellent choice for all types of races/challenges.

Track 9
Artist: Faetal
Track: Phosphor Sky
Label: Wasp Factory
Length: 5.53
Rating: 3

Sections with slow plodding beats and little energy, counterpointed with sections of hard electric guitar riff work make this a tough song to match to a race. Works fairly well with the NYC bridge races, and Nurburgring, but not much else.

Track 10
Artist: mind.in.a.box
Track: Walking
Label: Wasp Factory
Length: 3.50
Rating: 4

An extremely catchy melodic chorus, keeps this song alive. Great general track for racing or completing challenges.

Track 11
Artist: Squarepusher
Track: Menelec
Label: Warp Records
Length: 5.30
Rating: 1

Disjointed rhythms and random noise, make this a tough one to match to just about any situation. Gets annoying super quickly. I guarantee you will be slamming the skip button, just as quickly. Avoid.

Next Up.. Electronica

<< back to PGR3 Soundtrack Review Index

PGR3 - REVIEW - Soundtrack

I'm sure there have already been a million reviews of this game. I'm not planning on going into the overall merits of this game in this review. It's an excellent game. Period. The purpose of this entry is to review Project Gotham Racing 3's soundtrack. I wanted to review the audio tracks, not for their artistic merit in general, but for how well they work in the context of the game.

A game in the racing genre, can be made or broken by the quality of its soundtrack. My favorite racing series of all time, Wipeout, is a perfect example of this. (With the exception of Wipeout Fusion, of which we shall not speak.) The Wipeout series perfectly melded high speed racing, and an outstanding soundtrack. The soundtrack did an excellent job of drawing you into the game experience.

What, if anything, PGR3's soundtrack lack in quality.. It definately makes up in quantity. PGR3 features 101 audio tracks broken down into 9 genres consisting of Alternative Rock, Rock, Electronica, Dark Electronica, Hip Hop, Industrial, Bhangra, Japanese Pop, and Classical.

In a series of 9 posts, I plan to review all 9 genres, and each of the 101 audio tracks. I will update this post with links to each of the 9 posts to follow as I complete them.

• 1. Dark Electronica - Rating: 4/5
• 2. Electronica - Rating: 3/5
• 3. Alternative Rock - Rating: 3/5
• 4. Bhangra - Rating: 4.5/5
• 5. Classical - Rating: 1/5
• 6. Rock - Rating: 2/5

You may ask why do a review of a game thats been out for so long. PGR4 was recently released.. Why not review that one?.. Well PGR3 was recently rerelased for the Platinum Series with a price tag of 20 bucks. Im a huge fan of the Platinum series, because it gives you the opportunity to own some of the greatest games for Xbox360, at a price you can afford.

If you do not own this title, my advice to you.. Go and get it. It's WELL worth the 20 dollar price tag.

Enjoy!

Hello All!

I'm Chris, and I will be collaborating with Jack on this blog. I wanted to take this time to introduce myself.

Jack and I have known each other for a long long time now. We both share a love of videogames. I have been gaming since the Atari 2600 days and have played many many games on many many consoles. I enjoy PC gaming as well, but haven't had as much time to spend on the PC of late. I currently own NES, N64, Dreamcast, Playstation, PS2, and XBOX 360 consoles.

I have 2 ugly kids aged 16mo and 4years. Just for the record.. my wife is the only girl I have ever put over a game.

My 4 year old is just starting to get into gaming which is really cool. He currently loves playing Viva Pinata, and Lego Star Wars 2. He is kind of annoying to play LSW2 with, since he seems to like to run the opposite direction im going in all the time, but I'm not giving up hope yet.

Lately, I have been really into PGR3, the Orange Box, Rock Band, and am currently awaiting patiently Assassins Creed (my Christmas gift).

My function here will be to help Jack maintain the blog, and collaborate on posts with him. I hope you enjoy my contribution to this blog. I am very excited to be a part of it.

Calling All Cars - REVIEW - PS3

For the first 10 minutes I played the game with a grimace on my face, I must have yelled "FUCK OFF" to the TV 8 times. While this might seem that the game both sucks, and that I am quite insane, it does not. The game is exactly what the PS3 needs - an affordable party game that puts almost every Wii game to shame...in both graphics and playability.

You start off by picking from 6 or so vehicles, jump in a level and play. A jailbreak occurs, a crook tunnels out of the ground and you hunt him down. Hit the crook with your car and he is thrust into the air, quickly catch the criminal and haul ass to the jail. There are 3 "goals" at the jail, 1 point, 2 point, and 3 point holes to drop the criminal off and collect your points. The game has been compared to NBA Jam, I've never played it, so I'll say it plays like capture the flag.

Let's stop this now, just go buy it. It's 10 bucks. The only thing I can say bad about the game is that it's a bit too short, I'm guessing more levels will be available for download in the future, I just hope they'll be cheap enough to justify the purchase. Let me put it this way, 5 more levels for 10 more dollars. If it gets to the point where I'm paying up to 50 bucks for a full game I'm gonna be pissed.

Keep them coming Sony, 10 dollar games that look better and play better than Wii games is the right way to pull people in...and a controller that actually works doesn't hurt either.

Soul Calibur something or other for Wii...who cares!

Prediction - This game will suck, it will have crappy motion controls that won't work. I'm not really a big fighting game fan, so I may not be the best person to critique one that isn't even out yet, but fighting games need pinpoint accuracy. Personally, I think that fighting games took a huge blow when they went to 3D, it just felt like the collision detection wasn't there as it should be. Now add in the motion controls from the Wii remote, that quite frankly don't work well anyway, and we've got a major shit storm coming...I think I smell it!

Console war predictions...yeah, late.

I know that the predictions for the "winner" usually take place before or during the launch period of consoles, but i didn't start this blog until after they all launched, so blow me.

Wii - People will grow tired of crappy looking games, they will grow even more tired of crappy looking games with awful controls. Wii owners will buy the occasional Nintendo published games and shun third party games - It's the N64/GC all over again folks.

Xbox 360 - People will eat this thing up, but will be buried under a pile of FPS and war games with little else to chose from. After the 4th version of the 360, gamers will unite at Microsoft headquarters and throw their power bricks like...uh, bricks, at Billy Gates. In the long run MS will come out on top, not with system sales, but with game sales.

PS3 - Unless Sony drops the price on this thing, they will come out on the bottom. That one guy from Japan, Yoshi, and I are the only people stupid enough to buy this thing - and even we are getting bored of it. It's not that Sony is really doing anything wrong, they just need good games and a reasonable price point...DUH!

That's it, goodnight.

Lost in Blue 2 - REVIEW - DS

The original Lost in Blue was an amazing launch game when the DS first came out, if you haven't had the pleasure of playing it, hit Ebay, Best Buy, or Gamestop (as a last resort) and pick it up. Think of it as the TV show Lost, without the fat slob Hurley saying "Dude" every 5 seconds. You start off watching a cut scene of your character on a ship, storm comes, you're shipwrecked. Along with a female companion, you try to keep yourselves alive by finding/catching food, building furniture, solving puzzles, and trying to figure out the secrets of this island.

Sounds great, right? Well, while the original was a great balance of doing all these tasks. The sequel took the most annoying part of Lost in Blue, which was scrounging for food, and turns it into the main focus of the game. You spend about 3/4 of the day fishing and collecting coconuts, it's a bore-fest. I wanted to love this game, but when playing a video game becomes more annoying than dragging my ass out of bed and going to work, I can't recommend spending your hard earned money on it.

Maybe when Lost the video game comes out, it'll take everything good about Lost in Blue, and leave out the food hunt.

Just say NO to the Elite!!!

As much as I wanted to cave in and buy the Elite...I just couldn't do it. The Premium 360 will have the new more quiet chips and the HDMI port in the fall, so I convinced myself to hold out for a bit longer. I have Gears of War just sitting there in plastic, guess I'll be returning that to the store soon. Meanwhile, I have a PS3 collecting dust because I'm too cheap to shell out the cash for Motor Storm - and let's be honest, that's the only game worth buying at this point.

I heard some crazy rumor about some of the Premium 360 units actually floating around out there with the HDMI port. Is this true? Please let me know in the comments if it's true, I think I'm just stupid enough to shell out $400 now, then sell it back when the new version comes out.

The greatest games that were never made.

As usual, the news in the video game world is extremely slow, so I thought I'd talk about the greatest properties that were never made into games.

First is Ghost busters, and no, the games that were made already... are not really games at all. I'm kidding of course, the Genesis GB is actually pretty good - the NES GB games smells like dick dipped in dog shit. There is a GB NES game that is also kinda good, it's a birds eye view perspective- a little bit Zelda NES/Rambo Genesis.

About 4 or 5 months ago, there was a teaser trailer for a GB game that looked like Gears of War, I'm guessing that it was for the 360. I must say that I'm very disappointed in the media for not getting their hands dirty on this one, this was the biggest news to happen in years. It's the dream of any 30-something to have a video game based on the show/movie we grew up with (I'm still waiting on Silver Spoons: Little Ricky Schroeder's Revenge). I'd like to take it to the next level now, along with this realistic GB, I want a game based on The Real Ghost Busters. Can you even begin to imagine what it would be like to battle with Sandman, The Boogie Man, the ghost versions of the GB crew? It would no doubt be THE SHIT!

I want capcom to bring back Duck Tales (2D please). Gummi Bears, think about this one, a 3D Wind Waker style visuals, Action/Adventure/Rpg. When you get into a battle you can fight like Mario (stomping on an ogre) , for magic you could drink Gummi Berry Juice and bounce all around the screen causing "massive damage"to all foes in the battle.

You know what? I'm gonna stop here, I think I can drag this out to be a weekly thing where I pick one old or new TV show, and explain how to make it into a great game. Sounds good, no?

Ninja Gaiden Sigma demo

If you are one of the many angry/bored PS3 owners waiting for the next big thing, the wait is over. Sometime tonight the demo for NGS will be available for download, most likely for free. If you've never had the pleasure of playing the other iterations on the Xbox, you really need to at least try out this demo. Having played Ninja Gaiden Black, I can tell you, that this is hands down the best Action/Adventure game on the system. I only got through the first 4 levels (It's hard as all hell), but from that short amount of play, I'd say that it's right up there with God of War (which I've only plowed through the first 3 levels).

Get yourself a Cup O' Joe, some Stacker pills, or even an 8-ball of coke (if that's your thing) and refresh away until it shows up sometime later tonight.

Making amends

So, you may have noticed I'm the angriest person on the planet, it would seem that I spend more time bitching about games more than I do praising them. I'm going to make an effort to stop complaining, and I'm starting now. Join me in a walk down memory lane, as I share the story of the Christmas I received my Nintendo Entertainment System.

I don't recall the first time I actually put my hands on the controller of the NES (which is quite odd) , but the greatest memory I have as a child was the first NES I actually owned. For some strange reason, the X-mas of 87, my family opened our gifts late on Christmas eve. As usual, we'd start with the stockings which probably contained the usual small gifts - Smurf trading cards (remember those huge packages?) , Garbage Pail Kids, I really don't remember what else could have been in there. Then we'd move on to the big gifts, I remember getting a cool sled, and some crappy clothes. After ravaging through all the big box gifts, I remember being very depressed because none of them contained the NES I'd been begging for that whole year. My mother asked me if there was anything that Santa had "forgotten", I grumpily replied "He forgot my Nintendo". She said "Don't worry, there's always next year". Of course when you're 10 years old, a year seems like an eternity, and you're already plotting ways to sell your body for pennies to save up to buy one yourself...What, you didn't do that at 10? So moms says, "Why don't you go into the kitchen and turn on the radio so we can hear some Christmas music". The last thing I wanted was to hear was "Here comes Santa Clause" for the billionth time that evening, but I reluctantly complied. I strolled into the kitchen, opened up the cabinet where our stereo and TV were housed...HOLY SHIT. There it was, already hooked up and eagerly awaiting my grubby Doritos infested hands. I played Super Mario Bros. until 2:30 in the morning, I remember my mother coming into the kitchen for a drink saying "What the hell are you still doing up"? She of course made me turn the system off and go straight to bed, but it was worth a mild scolding to travel through the mushroom kingdom.

I really have to hand it to my parents, it was so exciting to be surprised like that. Even now 20 years later, it makes me happy/sad to think back on those times of being a kid, where video games, playing army in the woods, and selling your body for Kid Icarus carts is your whole world. I've not since had a better experience, and I never will.

Fuckin Microsoft

Yeah, so the Xbox 360 elite comes out in a week or so, and as I've been saying, this is going to be the time when I finally join in on all the fun. Well, yet again I'm getting second thoughts, rumor has it that this is just to tide us over until the next Xbox 360 version 3.1 will be coming out. This will include the newer chips that will make the system run quietly and maybe, uh...not break?

This is just insane to me, why as a company that's trying to make a name for themselves in the video game market, would you constantly shoot yourself in the foot? Releasing 75 different versions of a $400 + console will not sit well with the gaming community- this is not the game boy. It's hard to justify spending this that much dough once, let alone 3 fucking times!

Here's the problem, I can't wait any longer. I bought Gears of War a week ago and I'm not gonna deprive myself of the fun I should have been having for so long. So I'll bite this time Microsoft, and I'll just sell the Elite when the next one comes out, but PLEASE stop with the bullshit. If the next version comes out 3 months after the Elite, I'm going to lose my shit!

Videogames cause you to kill?

With this recent shooting at Virginia Tech., I hear that Jack Thompson and Dr. Phil are pointing towards video games for the reason of the killings. This will most likely be the first and last time I ever comment on this bullshit of video game violence leading to real life violence - it's been beaten to death and needs to stop. People are crazy, it's just that simple. In a country where there is so much pressure to succeed in a career, we're constantly rushing around overwhelmed with the aspects of everyday life. I hear that this guy killed all these people because a girl broke up with him... Dude, there is so much gash out there, you would have found another one. When you're young, you think that the person you are currently dating is the only one for you, growing up is hard, and it's not until you get older that you realize there is no such thing as love or a life long mate.

Stop blaming parental influence, parents rarely play a part in a child's day-to-day problems. At eighteen years old we are adults, and at around that age we are responsible for our own actions. Stop blaming the media, any media. It's entertainment, if a video game, movie, or celebrity influences you to go out and do something stupid, then something is lacking in your life, and maybe you need to seek some professional help.

My goal is just to get through this life without bothering anybody, if something is bothering me, I keep it to myself or talk to a friend to get it off my chest. It's really that simple, I just don't understand why people feel the need to take out innocent people because of something going on in their world. Sometimes I just wish that god would just beam me up already, humans are starting to freak me out.

Everyone's a critic, and most people are douchebags

Wow, absolutely nothing going on worth writing about. I guess I'll continue my rant on what Nintendo is screwing up. Zelda DS, Wario DS- What do these 2 games have in common? They're both victim to this horrible new disease called Stylusitis. This is where Nintendo injects awful control into our most beloved games, then stands back and watches them die a slow awful death. I'm sure I've already bitched about this, but I'm really sick of Nintendo trying to fix what's not broken.

Yes, I'm overly critical about everything, but when I think back to Super Mario 64 I just can't imagine why you would screw with something that was so perfect. You don't have to constantly rebuild a game, sometimes it might just be "good enough". Well Nintendo saw things a little different and we ended up with Super Mario Sunshine, not a bad game, but still nowhere near the quality of SM64. Remember Wario Land 4 on the GBA? How about Zelda: The Minish Cap? Me too, they were both perfect 2D games that could have had a minor graphical upgrade, and nobody would have complained. Now we are getting the shaft again, this time in portable form. The stylus will be controlling just about EVERYTHING, from the movement of the character in Zelda, to the actions the character performs in both titles. Lets say you have to take a shit, when you go into the bathroom there is a little man in green tights (strangely enough he looks like Tingle) , he tells you he's been working on a new way to evacuate the excrement... and it's from your mouth now! It's actually even worse than you would imagine, but he doesn't care and insists that it will be a better way for you to "take care of business".

Some games will benefit from this type of control, some won't- but I feel that as a hardcore supporter of these franchises that I should be given a choice. Would you want this sort of thing to happen to a 2D metroid? Of course not, but who's to say it won't happen? I guess we have to vote with our $$$, as hard as it will be, I'm going to pass on both of these titles - and I've never left a Zelda title on the store shelf for more than 1 minute without rushing to the check out counter with it.

I think I hate Nintendo...

I'm sure it's just the anger of the inferior Wii graphics, but after purchasing Super Paper Mario today, I'm just so uninterested in Nintendo products. I put in the disc and played for about 20 minutes, then I just turned it off. To understand what a huge deal this is I suppose you have to know my entire gaming history, I'll spare you every small detail, for now. Just know this, from the mid 80's up until now I've pretty much been as loyal to Nintendo as Robin Quivers is to Howard Stern - and almost as long. Please don't give me the "Good graphics do not equal good game play" line we've been spoon-fed ever since the Wii was announced to have Game cube 1.5 capabilities, I'm tired of the lies, I'm tired of the future promise of what the Wii can probably do.

This is it Nintendo, THIS is your wake up call. If the Wii is wearing thin on me this shortly after launch, you have a HUGE problem. I'm not saying that your empire is going to crumble because one angry fanboy is not blown away by shit graphics, but I am saying that if the competition can start to lure away one member of the Nintendo army (again, you have no idea how deep my love goes) then you're certain to see a few more behind me. Stop fucking around, bring out some killer software. Stop pushing games back from February to November, You're becoming the birthday visit to Grandma's house, sure you love her, but is it really worth the $5.00 check for 3 hours of pinched cheeks?

This all could have been avoided if you actually gave your hardcore audience a little respect, would it have really hurt to have graphics on par with first generation Xbox 360 games? What's that you say, "but it's cheap"?! Let me enlighten you just a bit, $250 for something that looks like something I can pay $100 for really scares me - quite frankly I'm not too sure how you got away with it at all. What, "It plays better now"?! My only reply (and this isn't going to be the last time I say it) "Please readjust your Wii remote"- not to mention I really enjoyed swinging my arm around like an asshole in Zelda, no really I wouldn't have rather pushed the convenient "A" button right next to my thumb. What are you going to do when Sony and Microsoft bring their systems down to the $300 mark? Let me take a guess, lower it down to $100? Didn't work for the Game cube, and that was almost on par with the graphics of the original Xbox.

We have about 5 years left on this system, and I'm willing to give you up until that time to really "WOW" me. But, when the next batch of systems come out, and you're late to the party again, don't skimp on the bells and whistles that gamers want. You can only string us along for so long, and like the battered wife who can't endure another punch to the face, you may come home one day to an empty house.

PS3, day 3

OK, starting to really get into this thing now. First lets talk about the downloadable content, I didn't buy any games for the system on day one, so I downloaded just about everything under the sun- including the stupid movie trailers. At first the downloads were taking way too friggin long, roughly 8 minutes per percent, that's completely retarded in this modern age of flying cars and movie theaters with a holographic Jaws popping out to eat you on the street corner. But it seems to be downloading pretty fast now, either that or I'm completely deluding myself. It seems as if Motor storm will have to be purchased at some time, It's kinda like Excite truck, but of course less fun, and much prettier. Watched a couple BLU-RAY movies (Rambo and Dark Water), I can see the difference in DVD/BLU-RAY but I'm not so sure it's a $600.00 + difference.

Yesterday I broke down and had to buy a game, Oblivion, I'm so lost in it-both in that it's really immersive and I'm so overwhelmed in not knowing what to do next. Oblivion looks really good, but it's a little choppy and I'm pretty sure in the age of Fax machines and the Roomba, we should be at 60 frames per second at all times. The only real gripe I have is the fact that I happen to have the only brand of TV where the screen flashes every time I switch from format to format, it's really annoying to have to turn the TV off and on again when I want to go from playing a game, to watching a DVD.

In closing I'll let you know of something stupid I did, I bought Gears of War for the 360. That might not sound so dumb to John T. Customer, but I don't even own the 360 yet, and I won't until the end of the month when the Elite comes out. I'm getting way too excited about this thing, and wanted to make sure I had it when I pick up the system. You may be asking yourself, "Where the crap does he get all the dough to buy all this high end technology"? Well friends, I had to do some less than desirable things that I'm not too proud of....excuse me while I go rinse my mouth out with gasoline.

PS3....NOW IN HAND

I hope Sony asks me to burn my pants, these things are driving me nuts.

Yeah that's right, broke down and bought the PS3 today, a little over $800 (and that's not even including a game). Here's the run down....

1. System $600

2. HDMI cable $70

3. 2 year replacement warranty $100

all that plus tax.

Let me explain, the HDMI cable will be returned to the store as soon as I get the one I ordered online, and if you've ever owned either PlayStation console.... then you know exactly why the warranty is a must. I just can't wait until the price drops in about 2 months so I can slit my wrists and wallow in my own crapulance.

Sometimes you just gotta be stupid and treat yourself to useless crap, there's nothing I want to play on it yet, but hey, it's a blu-ray player and I can still play my Ps1 and ps2 games on it right? I'm really excited about the PlayStation Store though, got some free demos that take forever to download, looks like I'll be PS2 gaming on it for the next few months...sigh.

But the biggest kick in the face is the fact that I own a Westinghouse HDTV-this is apparently the one TV that has a problem where the screen flickers every time you switch between any options. I have to turn the TV off, then on again to set it straight- not unbearable, but still kinda retarded.

Check back next month when I blow another $600 on the 360 elite, but at least I know I'll be getting a few kick ass games with it.

Check this out!!!!!

Go to Gamesradar.com and read the story on the game store clerk. It's pretty friggin accurate, and reminds us all who've worked for a certain corporation, let's call them shit stop, that there is no shame in crying into your pillow on those cold, lonely nights.

I'd love to tell the whole story of my 5 year imprisonment, but I'll just give you a few highlights.

1. Tony Hawks Pro Skater became Toma Hawk Pro skater

2. A cardboard standee zombie for Resident Evil had a speech bubble that read "Meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow"

3. A cardboard standee of a football player for Madden was waiting behind the bathroom door, when you went to take a shit, you'd shit your pants before you'd reach the bowl.

4. "Do you have Rainbow 7 or 8"? "You know, the sequels to Rainbow 6"

5. "I want GTA, I just wants to kills peoples"

6. Customer-"Y'all gots games fo 2"? Me-"2 player"? Customer-"naw, P2" Me- "What the hell's a p2"? Customer-"PlayStation 2 Yo"!!

7. Young boy runs into the store and notices a Pokemon poster on the wall and screams "SCIZOR"!!!!!!!

Just a quick message for all employee's of any shit game store, I've been out of the retail biz for about 3 years now, and the only advice I have to give is to get out NOW! Get fired so you can collect unemployment, it's a very scary thing to leave a job, but this way you'll have some kind of money coming in. Take your time finding the next shit job you'll get- you'd be surprised at how miserable you really were. Retail sucks the soul clean out of you, if it's the only thing you can do, go back to school, get a job landscaping, whatever you can do to avoid this pit of despair.

Resident Evil 4: Wii Edition

It's official, I'm now disgusted with the Wii, that is unless this thing turns out to actually have GOOD Wii controls. I can picture it now, I'm in the village with 15 or so zombies, 2 feet from my face......Please readjust your Wii remote. Fuck that, if I'm to put up with ports of games from yesteryear, I best be getting.....

1. slight upgrade in graphics

2. 2 or more new levels

3. a super easy mode (I am terrible at video games)

4. the best controls possible- do not throw it together in a day or 2

Now I know this news is still fresh, and we don't know what we're getting yet, but I can't help but feel that we're getting the shaft already. They've not yet shown me that the Wii is a capable system. I praise Excite Truck, but for a system that launched 4 months ago, the only glimmer of hope (Metroid) is at least another 4 months away.

Can't blog, shit pants

For the zero amount of people reading my blog, sorry but I had the shits, and was very ill. Girlfriend is also in the hospital, so I'll update by tomorrow.

GAMES OVER GIRLS PODCAST

Don't get too excited just yet, this isn't the big announcement of when the podcast will be starting, it's quite a ways off. As I write this I'm listening to the Cheapassgamer.com podcast, all I can say is that suicide doesn't seem like such a bad idea. I can't wait until we can get our thing up and running, listening to the dog shit that's out there makes me more and more confident that what we have in store will by far be the best video game related podcast PERIOD. With the exception of the 1up.com podcast, the people who do these things are completely void of any personality.They try way too hard to be funny by laughing at all there own jokes and just laughing at random comments they make- it's like the tards who put lol after every comment they make on a message board like "I just got home from work and ate a peanut butter and banana sandwich lol lol lol". Why are people such jerk offs?

Anyway, getting back to the podcast. It's not really going to be an informative show, just a few guys giving our views on what's going on in the industry and what kinds of things we would like to see change. Expect a lot of nostalgia, I really miss the 8 and 16 bit days- mainly i just really miss playing 2D games on a big screen. Think of it like the Retronauts podcast minus the douche bags.

I don't mean to be a prick to the 1up.com guys, I respect there work, but between Luke Smith yelling "JESUS CHRIST GARNET" every fucking 2 minutes, and that cunt Chris Kohler with his constant interrupting all the time, it's enough to drive you insane. Wouldn't you like to here people just talking without the ego's? Well we'll be delivering it, hopefully sooner than later.

Nintendo F-ing it up again?

I'm leaving myself open to a lot of shit by even suggesting this, we all know how crazy Nintendo fans are right? I sure do, I'm one of them- and I have the Tattoos to prove it beotch.

Here's the deal, Nintendo has a monster success on it's hands with the Wii, nobody will argue that, but can anybody tell me why or how? Half the time when I play the Wii I'm fighting with the controls to work, the sensor bar is really hit or miss- this is most apparent when I'm playing Wii play in billiards, I'll pull back the remote, then shoot it forward getting the "please readjust remote". This is very frustrating and completely breaks the immersion, bringing you right back to the real world where our president is a big boob, and Sanjia is sure to be our next American Idol. The only game so far that assures me that there's hope is Excite Truck, the game is friggin brilliant and is very deserving of a re-review from every major publication.

Now I don't want to get into the whole topic on the graphics, but I suppose I have to. Every company making games for the Wii really need to step it up and start delivering the goods! No more ports (except for Okami and Resident Evil 4). I really wanted a graphical monster like the 360 and Ps3, It almost makes me want the consumers to stop supporting the Wii so Nintendo will have to go ahead with the next system- I would have really liked to see a Zelda or Mario game with the beauty of Kameo, Gears, or any other of the pretty games we're seeing from the competition. I mean Mario Galaxy is starting to look really slick....but it ain't that slick.

So in closing, Nintendo, please start using that seal of approval thing that used to mean something so I don't have to bash you anymore- it makes me feel very ugly inside.

XBOX360 ELITE !!!!!!

It's big, it's black, and it costs a lot of money......it's Star Jones as a prostitute. On another note Microsoft finally announces the Xbox 360 Elite system, which is of course the xbox 360 with a 120 gig hard drive, an HDMI output(cables included), and a nice black coat of paint- the hard drive comes pre loaded with some demos and stuff, but OUCH $480.00?!

Now the question I suppose would be if it's worth the purchase. Do you already own a 360? Do you own an HDTV with an HDMI input? Are there any games on 360 that you want to play? Do you have this kind of cash to be throwing around?

The thing is I'm already starting to debate myself over buying it-If this thing had Blu-ray or HD-DVD built in I wouldn't even bat an eye about it, but that's a lot of dough to throw down. I'm going to cave in, I've deprived myself of 360 goodness since launch-there are a few great games now, and Bio shock and Blue Dragon are on the way.

This also brings me to the beating I've been giving myself over getting the Ps3.

Here's the Pros-

Metal Gear, Blu-ray, backwards compatibility, no need for memory cards with the hard drive, and that Naughty Dog game that looks like Indiana Jones.

Here's the cons-

360 might get Metal Gear, I won't be able to get all my favorite movies on Blu-ray, what's going on with the backwards compatibility?, what if the Naughty dog game blows?

As a gamer I am very confused, as consumer I'm even more confused. What the crap is one supposed to do if the Ps3 totally tanks? Am I supposed to say "oh well I gave the Ps3 a shot and it ended up sucking, but what the hell, it was only 600 bucks." F that, the 360 as of right now has proven to me that it's got staying power so that's a go. I'm going to have to wait for either a price drop on the Ps3 or some amazing first party software that's coming out soon.

Check in tomorrow and I'll tell you why Nintendo is screwing up royally, and what they can do to fix it.

Wii shortages intentional blah blah blah

I'm sure by now you've all read on the compuper today about the wii shortages being intentional, but I can tell you that this isn't exactly the whole truth. My sister has a friend, who has a dildo, who has a cousin works at Nintendo and he's....well it's (can't really call a dildo he can you?) told me that it was really a production problem with Duct tape, you know, being that the the wii is 2 pieces of shit game cubes duct taped together HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA I'm so fuckin funny. Seriously though, me loves Nintendo so unbunch thems panties right now.

Welcome sportos, motorheads, geeks, sluts, bloods, waistoids, dweebies, and dickheads

I'm gonna make this a quick one. Basically i just wanted to say that this is going to be a site primarily about video games, but i may go off about random things like movies, music, whatever is giving me a chubbo or pissing me off at that moment.

I will not get into any technical jargon like mode 7, parallax scrolling backgrounds, or any of that other crazy shit the teenagers are talking about today. Tech talk bores me, I can only imagine that the only thing less interesting is watching Nascar, and quite frankly, I don't need that kind of pressure.

At some point there will be a real website going up. The main focus will be a podcast and trying to establish a real gaming community, gone will be the days of douche bags arguing over why the console they own is better than console x, IT'S BULLSHIT! enjoy gaming to it's fullest, buy every console- if you can't afford them all, buy what you can and respect the rest!! No company is perfect, that's why there are three of them- Nintendo gives us the best first party games and different way to play them on an inexpensive console, a huge library of games, but we're stuck with dog shit graphics. Sony gives us amazing visuals, Blu-ray dvd and a couple of really good exclusives.....for now anyway, a huge library of games, but the price is friggin ridiculous. And Microsoft is right in the middle , it has the best online system, HD-DVD add on, and has amazing visuals at a so so price, but the gripes I have with them are with the 3 sku idea and this new Elite model, don't get me wrong, it's cool, but i can't help thinking that they would've done better with a 60 or 80 gig hard drive and left it at $400.00.

Anyways, it's late, and I've got plenty of time to rant about all this on another day.

Thanks